Babisectomy
by Stupid Cow
Summary: Kiku has a Babisectomy. My version of Mpreg. Oneshot. -AsaKiku/EnglandxJapan- Warning: Mpreg, Lemon.


**Pairing:** AsaKiku (England x Japan)

**Genre:** Romance/Humor

**Warning(s):** Yaoi/shonen-ai/BL/whatever you want to call it, drunk & rape-y Arthur, Mpreg, and OOC-ness?

**Summary:** Kiku has a Babisectomy. My version of Mpreg.

**Disclaimer:** Hetalia's not mine, especially since I can't even draw Arthur right :C

**Author's Note:** So. -silence- Sorry guys ^^ I haven't posted anything in a while...but! It is my friend's birthday today, and our OTP for Hetalia is AsaKiku, so this is her present~

She is the Arthur to my Kiku. -heart- HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR-SAN ILU.

Oh, and Justin Bieber fans, please don't get _too _offended. I just don't like him very much. Besides, I spelled the name Beiber, not Bieber! ;P

**Babisectomy**

The letter appeared in Kiku's mailbox one day.

_Dear Honda-sama,_

_As requested, information concerning male pregnancy, or Babisectomy or Mpreg as we like to call it, has been provided. In research for approximately 40 years, the ability for this has fluctuated thoroughly. Two years ago, a professor of an university found a breakthrough by manipulating cell structure and the reproductive organs, Professor Beiber has finally perfected Mpreg._

Kiku stopped reading for a moment. _Beiber_. That name sounded familiar.

_The reason for Mpreg is to be able to impregnate a male with semen from another male partner. Professor Beiber has provided years of research, testing, and reports on this matter. Professor Beiber has tested this procedure on 64 men, earning a 98% guarantee. He has even tested it on himself approximately 17 years ago and now has a boy named Justin Beiber, who is now a popular star in America._

Kiku blinked. Oh. The girl Alfred kept talking about. The annoying lyrics ran through his head: _Baby, Baby._ He paused for a moment. _Wait...that was a boy? Seventeen years old?_ He frowned. It seemed this Mpreg thing had some side effects.

_The procedure is quick and efficient, lasting for an hour. Within this hour, special chemicals inserted into the body will allow specialists to operate without physical damage._

_And yes, that means you can keep your penis._

At this, the Asian nation mentally face palmed. Of course, they would appeal to those who wanted to "keep their penis." He kept reading.

_As you can see from the examples in this packet, this procedure would be able to: 1.) allow males to give birth, 2.) allow males to keep their penis, and 3.) is effective and painless._

He sighed once again. What a poorly written letter. He stuffed the paper into his back pocket, figuring that it would be of no use anyway.

Nevertheless,...he couldn't stop thinking about it. His hands wandered to his pocket repeatedly, patting it to make sure the letter was still there. After all, both he and his...his _lover _had wanted a child for so long.

They did not want to adopt one, but they wanted a child of their own. However, they both knew that it would never be able to happen. Much to both of their embarrassment, they discussed the matter together long ago. They had discussed names, whether they wanted a boy or a girl, everything. However, this had all happened while the other while the other man was drunk, after a long night of karaoke and sake with their best friends.

Arthur abruptly asked Kiku a question, he remembered, a blunt, "Do you want kids?" With that thought, the Japanese man flushed red, not answering the other man. The Englishman babbled on about how kids were so annoying, disruptive, and stupid. Kiku had been very disappointed, it showing on his face as his eyes slid down to look at the mat they were sitting on.

After returning from getting another bottle of sake for themselves, Alfred, Francis, and Feliciano all looked at each other with sad expressions. Despite Francis's protests, the other two men thought that then would be a good time to give Arthur and Kiku some time alone. They began to leave the house, dragging the other man with them.

It was then the bushy eye-browed man switched gears: "But I'd love that bloody kid if it were ours, Kiku." At this, Kiku's eyes widened as he looked up at his lover, his eyes shining as the man snorted at himself for "being so damn soft with him".

Returning to moments of the present, Kiku decided to call the office and made an appointment for Monday, with no other judgment. He would tell Arthur later.

OoOoO

Kiku never got a chance to tell Arthur because apparently he was overseas helping Alfred with something. And what was that _something_? Alfred had invited him over for the weekend to "prove that aliens are real!"Therefore, he went to his appointment without telling him.

Early as usual, he walked into the small office – though he was not even sure if it was a licensed place - and went up the lady at the front window. As he approached, he cleared his throat to get her to notice him.

"Oh! Sorry about that, please sign in," the woman said as she looked up at him from what she was doing, her eyes shining brightly.

She loved her job. She loved it so much, especially when she was able to see the shy faces that walked up to her every what seemed like every hour to sign in. It was obvious that all of the men in the facility were gay - and she was obviously okay with that. She was a yaoi fan after all. After all this time, she much preferred working with these men that she had the chance to see every day. They were always sweet, a small blush always on their faces as they came to their appointments here, and always made small talk with her.

They also were not like those douche bags that she dated.

"Um, okay," Kiku replied, a small smile gracing his lips. He signed his name and then blushed when he had to fill in the _Why are you here?_ column.

"Have a seat," she then offered, pointing at the chairs across from her window. Kiku's eyes glanced around, noting that there were approximately six men also waiting there. Five of them wore small blush on their faces, though the sixth one however, was so embarrassed that he held up a newspaper to cover his face, shaking. They must all have gone here for the procedure as well. He took a seat next the man with his face covered, taking notice of the uncomfortable seats.

Kiku looked up, trying to find a clock. His eyes darted to all the walls to find that there was none. Biting his lip, he gently nudged the person next to him to get his attention, "Um, excuse me, do you know what time it is?" he asked.

The person next to him jumped slightly, his face still in the newspaper. "God, don't you have your own fucking cell phone?" he growled as he pushed his paper down to see who was asking.

However, both of their eyes practically burst out of their heads as they discovered who the other was.

Lovino Vargas. Romano.

Kiku's mouth opened in an _O_ shape and gaped, unable to form any words.

"J-J-Ja...J-Japan...I-It's not what it fucking looks like, damn it! I-I just..." he trailed off, unable to continue. However, an interruption from the woman at the window saved him from having to talk to the Japanese man.

"Lovino Vargas? It's time for your appointment~" the lady chirped.

Still in shock, the Italian stood up unconsciously, stumbling towards the door. However, there was one little thing Kiku noticed about the young man: he had a small bulge on his belly.

_Huh. Well, I did hear some rumors about Lovino-san and Antonio-kun... _He bit his lip_. I thought it was just a rumor. Could he really be pregnant...?_

OoOoO

Kiku was about to stand up to ask the lady at the office how long it was going to take when-

"Honda Kiku? Time for your appointment!"

He sighed, standing up. Just has he had reached the door, it opened once again revealing the Italian that had gone in twenty minutes ago with a blush on his face.

"J-Japan! Fuck, K-Kiku...w-what are you doing here?"

He was quiet for a moment, his face red as well. "The...The Babisectomy..." he mumbled.

The other didn't respond, too stunned for words. Using this chance, Kiku looked down towards the Italian's belly. There was that small bulge again! He smiled, touching it slightly. Romano jumped back, but Kiku kept his hand there.

"You're going to be a good father."

"...Th-Thanks," he murmured, blushing.

Kiku walked past him, through the door.

Time for the procedure.

OoOoO

The procedure didn't take as long as he thought it would. And he didn't feel different at all.

Perhaps it hadn't worked?

He bought a pregnancy test anyway, ignoring the clerk's questioning look, and went home.

And when he got there, it didn't take much time to realize that the Englishman was drunk. After all, he did run up to Kiku, pulling him into a drunken hug while whispering into the asian man's ear, making him blush. Kiku's eyes scanned his lover's face, the bright red color it had flushed to, the half lidded eyes, and not to mention the bottles in the living room table and floor marked "Liquor" and all things related to alcohol. He must have found Kiku's key to the liquor cabinet.

"Mmm, Al - _hiccup_ - Alfred was wrong...aliens - _hiccup_ - a-aren't real..."

Kiku had to be careful around him. When drunk, his lover could do anything, including some things he would regret later. He headed to the table to clean up, however before he could reach the living room, he was stopped by Arthur's hand.

"Clean up later," he mumbled before crushing his lips with Kiku's.

"Mmm, you're drunk," Kiku protested.

"Ahahaha, I know that, love." Before Kiku could reply again, he brought their lips together, slipping his tongue in when Kiku gasped. By then, the asian nation had forgotten about the Babisectomy he had just endured, complying by slipping his hands around the other's waist. Arthur's tongue explored Kiku's mouth, running his tongue over the small places he knew his lover liked the best. Their tongues daned in a rhythm that was familiar to them both.

"Nngh," Japan moaned as Arthur's hand slipped into his hair, twirling the silk like material with his fingers, as if he were playing with it. His other hand ran down the Asian's body, his hand brushing the tent that was forming.

Reluctantly breaking apart for air, Arthur placed handfuls of kisses on his shoulder, hands reaching down to pull the kimono down. Realizing that the two were still standing up, Kiku walked backwards, urging Arthur with him until he hit the couch. Stumbling on the bottles that had been there, the Englishman slipped, pushing his lover onto the couch.

He continued trailing kisses down his body, his flat stomach lined with love. His hands skimmed Kiku's waist, fingering the band on his underpants, making him shudder. They were pulled down, revealing his fully erect manhood. Arthur stared, starting to make the other uncomfortable. His hands slid down, but instead of wrapping his hand around the length, he seperated Kiku's legs, running his hands down the sensitive spots, leaving goosebumps behind.

"Nnngh...A-Arthur-san, stop tea - aah!"

The Britishman kissed the tip of the cock softly, then engulfed half of it into his mouth. He closed his eyes, sucking off the precum, grasping Kiku's waist to stop him from struggling. He wrapped his tongue around the length, bobbing up and down. Relaxing his reflexes, he started to deep-throat the dick, wincing slightly.

"Haa...I-I'm going to - w-wait...!"

Arthur's fingers skimmed Kiku's entrance, smirking slightly as he pulled out.

He was much more sober now. Being with Kiku always made him return to his senses.

The Asian was now between Arthur and the couch, his body faced down after being flipped abruptly.

"A-Arthur-san...Lube..." he murmured, knowing what the other would do. He winced at the memory of his lover penetrating him without the lubricant.

"Don't have lube, love..."

"Th-Then, wha - "

His question was answered before it could even be asked. Arthur's tongue traced the skin around his hole, Kiku gasping at the contact. He had never done _that_ before.

The tongue expertly flicked around the spot, not penetrating quite yet. He brimmed the edges of the small, tight entrance before pushing his wet organ into the entrance. Kiku winced, not used to the wetness he felt this time. This...This whatever he called it was all new.

The tongue pushed through, attempting to stretch the entrance for what was coming next. Arthur pulled out for a moment, which made Kiku gasp in relief, then thrusted in with more force than he intended, surprising Kiku. His pants and groans increased, however not of pleasure. He still hadn't quite found his spot yet. Arthur thrusted his tongue in once more and -

"Aaaah! Nngh - !"

His lovely moan spilled out, reaching his so called Heaven. As he pulled out, he chuckled when he heard Kiku's disappointment.

"It's alright, love. I'll fill you with something even bigger," he whispered huskily into his lover's ear as he lined his length with the entrance, the tip touching the brim. Japan let out a small cry as he slowly fitted his manhood in, wincing slightly. Why was Kiku always so tight? Pushing most of his dick in, he shifted, convinced that Kiku was alright before he continued. Slowly, he thrusted in and out, trying to find the bundle of nerves he had before.

"Haaah! Aaaah!" Kiku screamed in pleasure, his mouth in the shape of an O, attempting to make his lover go faster. Arthur complied, his pace increasing.

Those wonderful sounds the Asian was making made him hotter and hotter, sweat running down his body.

"Ar-Arthur...I-I'm coming," Kiku cried, trying to hold back the orgasm. Arthur nodded.

"Then let's come together, yes?"

Both released, the sticky liquid coming out of the two simultaneously. The Asian's cum flew through the air, staining the couch.

"K-Kiku...!"

Arthur filled his lover, seeing white as he was filled with bliss.

He was now completely sober.

His eyes slipped closed as he slid out of Kiku's hole, pulling away his limp length for a moment, then coming back to a position beside Kiku on the couch, wrapping his arms around the asian. He smiled when he noticed his lover's eyes were already closed.

It had always started like that. With Arthur drunk out of his mind. But it always ended like this. Arthur was sober, falling asleep by his lover's side.

And yet, he could feel that this time, it was special. He didn't exactly know why, but he liked it.

OoOoO

Kiku bit his lip.

"A-Arthur-san?" The Englishman shifted, mumbling in his sleep.

"Hmm?"

"I-I'm pregnant."

He was silent.

"D-Did you hear me?"

The Britishman sat up, rubbing his eyes.

"Ahaha, sorry, love. I thought you said you were pregnant," he replied, amusement in his eyes.

"...I am."

"What?"

_Thump._ Arthur had fainted.

OoOoO

Later that day...

_Ring, ring, ring..._

"Moshimoshi," Kiku greeted.

"Ve~ Kiku, guess what?" It was Feliciano.

"What is it?"

"My brother~ Romano's pregnant~ Ve~ I'm going to be an uncle~"

Then he hung up.

_So, it's true then._

OoOoO

7 months later...

"This is Tomato!"

Kiku blinked. "Huh? This is a baby, not a tomato..."

The Spaniard laughed. "No, his name is Tomato! I got to pick the name!"

"Like Hell you're going to fucking name him Tomato!"

"B-But you said, Lovi~"

Kiku smiled slightly and looked down at the baby, though with difficulty because he had to look over his own bulge. He patted his stomach. Two more months.

The baby had Feliciano's hazel eyes, but it seemed like the boy had Antonio's personality. The eyes looked up at everyone, babbling an uncomprehensible language.

"Bastard, stop smiling!" Romano shouted, though there was a soft edge in his voice.

"Oooh, it's okay, Tomato! You aren't a bastard~"

"I didn't mean it that way!" The Italian shouted, blushing when he realized what he had just said.

"You're so cute, Lovi~"

OoOoO

2 months later...

Kiku and Arthur smiled at their baby.

"What are you naming her?"

"Hanako"

The baby's thick eyebrows wiggled, and Arthur raised his own. Kiku smiled and ruffled the messy black hair.

Then Arthur turned to face Kiku, wrapping his arms around him.

"I love you."

I love you, too."

Hanako let out a small cry and they smiled.

"We love you too."

**Author's Note:** WHAT IS UP WITH ME AND ARTHUR'S TONGUE? Srsly. I've used it 3 times in this fic. xD

This is my longest one shot ever~ If you haven't noticed. :D And my first Hetalia fic /shot.

I HOPE YOU LIKE IT, BIRTHDAY GIRL -heart-

Hanako - Little flower. /shot. I think of horrible names. It was going to be Ume, but I didn't really like "Plum blossoms." o.O PLUMS. (But they are very delicious. xD)

And the reason I had some Spamano in there? I needed a tsundere-ish character that could be uke in there. xD

Reviews are loved~


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